Life requires fun. I am sitting at work coloring between calls. The bright colors of the Lion King are comforting in the most unexplainable way... It brings me back to my youth. Let me tell you the story. Every time my sister and I had to go to the doctor, mom would bring us to the pharmacy to fill the prescriptions and let us pick up a coloring book as a kind of consolation prize. If it were a particularly bad cold we would get new Crayons as well. It was great. I used to color often and became a big fan of shading. Embracing a simple pleasure of youth keeps me happy.
Big things are happening for me. I feel like I could explode with all of the excitement. I will be able to see my mom and start a new job next week, the week after I will be in St Louis, MO for training on my company's money. I only have 3 more days to endure the call center!! Above all, I am in love with a wonderful man. Life doesn't get much better than this.
First thing, I got a promotion! I will be leaving the call center and going to the corporate office starting August 21, 2006. I am very excited. I did get a pay increase, although it was not significant. The main thing is I will no longer be in customer service. My new title is Client Benefit Administration Analyst Tester, quite the mouth full. I have a fuzzy idea of what I will actually be doing but will write more about that later. Another BIG thing is Georgia is thinking about going to South Korea to teach English as a second language for an entire year. She is in the process of obtaining her passport and if the phone interview goes well, she would be leaving to start on October 31, 2006. For truly selfish reasons I do not want her to go. She is my big sister and would not want her out of my reach for that amount of time. Also, they have nuclear weapons in North Korea and that isn't exactly far away! I would worry all the time. She wants to pay off her debt with the money she would earn so you can't fault that... but still. Some other news is that I went to Missouri this past weekend to see Robert and was introduced to the world of ballroom dancing. I loved it. I have never felt so elegant in my life as when I was waltzing. Robert has been taking lessons for the past year and was definitely a strong partner to assist a beginner. I am hoping I can get Brent to take lessons with me here in Minneapolis. We'll see about that one! ;) But the trip was great. We talked so much and just enjoyed the weekend. Things are good right now... that's for sure.
On my previous post, I was very sad and a bit on the hopeless side. Let me tell you what I did to make myself happy again. I LEFT WORK! I hate my job and I simply could not take a full 8 hours. My head was pounding and there was absolutely no compassion in my voice. I left after half of my shift and laid in bed. Brent took care of me Friday night and was incredibly sweet to me, not even knowing the sadness that was plaguing me. He didn't read the post until the next day. I think he just sensed how unhappy I was and snuggled with me and made me giggle. Saturday I spent the day with my roommate and her friend Beth. We made breakfast and played Mario Kart. We talked about guys and shared old stories. Things women do. We hung up pictures in the livingroom making me feel instantly at home and content. They are photographs of Duluth, Minnesota that I took last fall. I blew them up and framed them, nature has always comforted me. I went out shopping at Target and for groceries that evening by myself and browsed. That night I watched a movie with Brent. On Sunday I went swimming, read my book outside in the sunshine, made myself breakfast and cleaned up around the apartment. Now I have canvas prints on my walls of bright, colorful flowers. I also hung some mirror panels and a Van Gogh print. My room makes me smile now. In short, everything I did this weekend brightened my spirits. I did things I enjoy.
My heart hurts. It seems full of sorrow and unwilling to cope. I am a strong person but strength only endures when it is determined to do so. I have lost that determination. I have lost the focus of taking care of myself. I need to embrace what makes me happy on an individual level. Read. Walk. Laugh. Play. Kiss. Write.
